This was recorded by the Portsmouth Sinfonia in an experiment where all the members of the orchestra would swap instruments with each other and attempt to play them to the best of their ability.
favorite things about this
- literally all the brass starts to get the hang of it and then the crescendos happen and everyone is like FUCK FUCK FUCK??? FUCK. JUST. BLOW RLY HARD.
- the strings are lazy but also the same. like u can tell a lot of the ppl w/ the stringed instruments may already basically know how to play stringed instruments. like there’s definitely a section at the beginning where you hear a good portion going “oh yeah this is like. a smaller/bigger version of what i do.”
- all you hear of any woodwinds is just “pffffttt??? pFFFTTTT???? PFFFFFTTTT I SAID PFFFFTTTT!!!!!” bc woodwinds are fucking HARD and you hear after like the first crescendo half of them just give up. they give up. they’re done. fuck this it tastes weird and my lips hurt.
- that trumpet. that person is fucking TRYING man they fucking GOT this. they may not have figured out notes but they figured out LOUD and they GOT this.
I JUST DIED
I had to grab my inhaler
They have not swapped instruments. The entire point of the Portsmouth Sinfonia is that they’re playing instruments they have no idea how to play.
(via thelibrandy)2,680,071 plays
I dunno if this works for Vegemite too, never had it that I’m aware of, but:
Either get hold of some highly sophisticated Scandinavian crispbread
or put a slice of Wonderbread in the toaster
Scrape a thin but present layer of butter across your substrate
Add a minuscule amount of Marmite and mix with the butter, spread the consequent butter-Marmite emulsion across your substrate
This is tougher with toast because the butter melts and sinks in quickly before it can dilute and spread the Marmite, but YOU GET THE PICTURE. You do NOT ever attempt to consume neat Marmite, and if you do, you deserve the snickering.
Marmite dissolved in hot water is a hell of a good fake-stock base for anything demanding beef stock but not asking for too much by way of authenticity. It is also lethally moreish. You nibble on a properly prepared triangle of toast-with-butter-and-Marmite or Kavli-with-butter-and-Marmite and if they did it right you will go “OH SHIT, THAT’S WHAT THEY MEAN BY ‘UMAMI’?”
Also I guarantee that after you’re used to the taste you will me ladling the Marmite onto your toast with a spoon
Or I may just be weird and addicted
Anonymous asked: do you have any roachtips for maximizing life radness??
- Be brave.
- Be kind.
- It’s okay to be sad sometimes.
- If you’re sad all the times, get help. Life is not for suffering.
- Learn to make things. If you can’t draw, knit. If you can’t knit, garden. If you can’t garden, program, etc. Babies count on a technicality, but only just.
- Fake being rad. This is accomplished by being regular levels of weird, but elevated levels of confident about it. Speak loudly, dance and sing badly, announce every single pun as it occurs to you, and keep your chin up. No one can tell fake rad from real rad, it turns out.
I gave this last tip to my niece a couple of weeks ago. It is the truest shit.
Except I think I phrased it ‘do whatever feels good and if you fuck up, act like you meant it. If you have enough swag, people will copy you.’
Is this circulating because if it’s not it needs to be, this armor is totally practical.
Bringing it back the totally suitable lace dick sheet armor
So can he be on my team?
I’m a cleric so I’m good backup I swear…
Who do I have to pay to get this armor design into a game?
Now this is the sort of sexism and objectification I could shove money at.
Hunter, Steph, all your demon characters now wear this.
I AM SEVERELY UNCOMFORTABLE
WHICH, I SUPPOSE, IS PROBABLY THE POINT, FOR A MALE VIEWER
GOOD JOB, ARTIST.
EQUALITY FOR SKIMPY ARMOURS YESSSSSSSSSS
Dick sheet armor
Hehehehe, so when does this game come out?
He’d have to stand there very still
And hope no breezes came along
The Paper Bag Princess by Robert Munsch
published: May 1, 1980
““Elizabeth was a beautiful princess. She lived in a castle and had expensive princess clothes. She was going to marry a prince named Ronald.
Unfortunately, a dragon smashed her castle, burned all her clothes with his fiery breath, and carried off Prince Ronald.
Elizabeth decided to chase the dragon and get Ronald back. She looked everywhere for something to wear, but the only thing she could find that was not burnt was a paper bag. So she put on the paper bag and followed the dragon. He was easy to follow, because he left a trail of burnt forests and horses’ bones.
Finally, Elizabeth came to a cave with a large door that had a huge knocker on it. She took hold of the knocker and banged on the door. The dragon stuck his nose out of the door and said, “Well, a princess! I love to eat princesses, but I have already eaten a whole castle today. I am a very busy dragon. Come back tomorrow.” He slammed the door so fast that Elizabeth almost got her nose caught.
Elizabeth grabbed the knocker and banged on the door again. The dragon stuck his nose out of the door and said, “Go away. I love to eat princesses, but I have already eaten a whole castle today. I am a very busy dragon. Come back tomorrow.” “Wait,” shouted Elizabeth. “Is it true that you are the smartest and fiercest dragon in the whole world?” “Yes,” said the dragon.
“Is it true,” said Elizabeth, “that you can burn up ten forests with your fiery breath?” “Oh, yes,” said the dragon, and he took a huge, deep breath and breathed out so much fire that he burnt up fifty forests.
“Fantastic,” said Elizabeth, and the dragon took another huge breath and breathed out so much fire that he burnt up one hundred forests. “Magnificent,” said Elizabeth, and the dragon took another huge breath, but this time nothing came out. The dragon didn’t even have enough fire left to cook a meatball.
Elizabeth said, “Dragon, is it true that you can fly around the world in just ten seconds?” “Why, yes,” said the dragon, and jumped up and flew all the way around the world in just ten seconds. He was very tired when he got back, but Elizabeth shouted, “Fantastic, do it again!”
So the dragon jumped up and flew around the whole world in just twenty seconds. When he got back he was too tired to talk, and he lay down and went straight to sleep.
Elizabeth whispered, very softly, “Hey, dragon.” The dragon didn’t move at all. She lifted up the dragon’s ear and put her head right inside. She shouted as loud as she could, “Hey dragon!” The dragon was so tired he didn’t even move.
Elizabeth walked right over the dragon and opened the door to the cave. There was Prince Ronald. He looked at her and said, “Elizabeth, you are a mess! You smell like ashes, your hair is all tangled and you are wearing a dirty old paper bag. Come back when you are dressed like a real princess.”
“Ronald,” said Elizabeth, “your clothes are really pretty and your hair is very neat. You look like a real prince, but you are a bum.”
They didn’t get married after all.””
"This story is a success because it is real. There are no princes but there are a lot of bums, and you don’t want to marry one."
In fourth grade they made us all pick a story, memorize it, and tell it to the entire class. I told this one.
This was my favourite story at age… seven or so. It is still one of my favourites. Elizabeth ranks up there with Cimorene on the “Awesome Fairy Tale Princesses” scale.
When I was a little girl my brother and I got given a book each my my mother. My brother got The Very Worst Monster, and I don’t remember what mum wrote in his book but I got this one and inside the cover it said, ‘To Libby, who isn’t a monster at all! Love, Mummy xxx’